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Elle J's avatar

This post wasn’t divisive at all. I read it as hopeful.

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J. P. Hill's avatar

This is music to my ears. Thank you ❤️

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Nicole O.'s avatar

ahhhh...having *just* finished bell hooks' A Will to Change, she instantly came to mind when I read the introductory words to this article...super nice to see your nod to her, and to see her words later in the article. It's clear for me to see how her work has helped shape your ideas for this piece and how antipatriarchal-feminist perspectives, like hers, offers us all, both men and women, a path toward wholeness and away from violence. Her work is such an inspiration! I hope your article offers men permission to choose a different path, outside of the toxic masculine archetype that this "imperialist white supremacist capitalist patriarchial" system has sold us all. Solidarity <3

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Francesca Cavallo's avatar

Bell Hooks is indeed more relevant than ever! Great analysis Joshua!

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Rachel Baldes's avatar

I really like this Joshua! I think this fear of connection/rejection is at the bottom of lot of misogyny and just shitty relationships from well-intentioned men too.

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Eudoxia's avatar

beautifully put!

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Robin Whitaker's avatar

I get where you're coming from Josh, and I think you're right, I just don't have the strength to put up with men anymore. I have two men remaining in my life but otherwise I've cut every other man out for falling prey to this disgusting toxicity. Someone needs to be available as a healthy space for these guys to go to, but it can't be me. I don't have the patience to coddle men who've been seduced by evil.

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Tessa Halbrehder's avatar

Toxic masculinity. They live it, they sell it, boys buy it. This new GOP of “your body my choice” is the worst thing I’ve ever heard of. I don’t know how we’ll get out of this. It will take moms & dads to talk to their kids. I hope it happens. I fear for young girls. Your piece is a good start. I hope men read it.

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𝓙𝓪𝓼𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓮 𝓦𝓸𝓵𝓯𝓮's avatar

There will neither be justice or peace until capitalism is abolished and the capitalist criminals are locked up. Capitalism is fascism.

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Maria Medira's avatar

I feel like there has been a festering backlash to the MeToo movement that has been given space now by the so called "broligarchy" to be unleashed. I can't help but think about what happened to Gisele Pelicot as one of the most horrific results of the backlash, where men are meeting online to find ways to rape women, be they strangers or family members. 70 000 plus (probably an underestimate) men looking to explore this online speaks to this disturbed and twisted melding of the need to find power, the need to find community and toxic masculinity.

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Penfist's avatar

To deny another humanity is to chip away at one’s own humanity.

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Mike Strand's avatar

from Ten Theses on the Far Right of a Special Type: The Thirty-Third Newsletter (2024) by Vijay Prashad. Aug 15 2024

https://thetricontinental.org/newsletterissue/ten-theses-on-the-far-right-of-a-special-type/

Thesis Five: The far right of a special type provides a partial answer to the loneliness that is woven into the fabric of advanced capitalist society. This loneliness stems from the alienation of precarious working conditions and long hours, which corrode the possibility of building a vibrant community and social life. This far right does not build an actual community, except when it comes to its parasitic relationship with religious communities. Instead, it develops the idea of community, community through the internet or community through mass mobilisations of individuals or community through shared symbols and gestures. The immense hunger for community is apparently solved by the far right, while the essence of loneliness melts into anger rather than love.

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Erwin Cuellar's avatar

And if you warn the men, many will take offense

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Ryan Ward's avatar

Excellent essay. Are you into music? Geordie Greep released an album dissecting the “alpha male” last year and it is a fascinating look inside the heads of these guys.

https://open.substack.com/pub/weareunderused/p/geordie-greeps-incel-musical-is-lewd?r=464u8m&utm_medium=ios

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Kai Eckenrode's avatar

Dude. Thank you. Your words give me oxygen and help elucidate things that I feel to my core.

The weaponization of masculinity is something we are not only witnessing now, but is captured in archival documents I have of my grandfathers school notes when he was a young teenager.

he was selected into one of the elite hilter ideology schools when he was a young boy) which also conditioned young men’s worldview as defending (shutting down vulnerability) the fatherland (patriarchal power) through violence (ideological and physical) as the most honorable form of service.

That’s a big tangent, but just know that your words resonate deeply and everything is arising within us, co-dependent and all.. you inspire me to keep writing because it fucking matters.

I’m actively thinking of how to share these findings in a way that offers ancestral hope in the face of despair.

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Kertz's avatar

Love this one! Gonna ask husband to read it.

You write so well, btw, just consistent, articulate beautiful word smith-ing!

(LOL I had to use the hypen there because the auto correct had you "smiting" the words 🙄.

Anyway, here's a thought you triggered for me: doesn't this anti fire fighter vitriol sound a bit like the criticism of USPS? And you mention fascist goals of privatizing public services and goods...I wonder if that would be a goal of the "incoming administration" as well. Not just police, postal services, but fire fighters and probably doctors and educators that line up in two tiers, one to serve their moneyed patrons well, with poorly funded counterparts for the rest of us.

I wish I was being paranoid 😕

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Maria Medira's avatar

I feel like there has been a festering backlash to the MeToo movement for years now, that has been given space by the current so called "broligarchy" to be fully unleashed. I can't help but think about what happened to Gisele Pelicot as one of the most horrific results of the backlash, where men are meeting online to find ways to rape women, be they strangers or family members. 70 000 plus (probably an underestimate) men looking to explore this online speaks to this disturbed and twisted melding of the need to find power, the need to find community and toxic masculinity.

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Diana van Eyk's avatar

An excellent article, Joshua. I often wonder about what's going on with young men these days.

These bits of your article jumped out at me:

"We all want real friends, relationships, to care and be cared for. It can be scary to admit that, and even scarier to try for these things and fail, but the idea that the answer must be either dominance over others or subservience to them is both false and unappealing. It’s a dangerously oversimplified way out of a complicated issue. And at the bottom of this answer, down at the root of this approach, is fear." and

"Men, what I ask you to consider is whether or not you’re being sold a wall. Are you being sold disconnection and agony and told it’s power? Are you being sold pain and told it’s freedom? Are you being told to deny your own humanity, just to make the fear go away for a minute? Are you cutting yourself off from love because you’ve been convinced that domination is what matters? And are you denying the truth, the truth that you want human connection just as much as anyone?"

All of us deserve to have our humanity intact, and respected and honoured by others.

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